nutshell

i have finally finished writing my admissions essay for the usp. a big thank you to kit for condensing the material among other improvements. all that's left to do is to send it over to the fuddy-duddies down at nus. hopefully it's accepted in a positive light. gosh i do hope i get a thumbs up from them.

this few weeks have been really tiring and it's all because of exams. i need to settle my tuition kids and the kids at the centre on top of my own brother. and have you gone through the kind of math questions they expect poor little primary 6 students to answer these days? amazing! just last 2 weeks for example: it took me 20 whole minutes to do a problem sum. its crazy. why does it have to be so abstract and complicated? even secondary one math is not so trying.

also, is it me or does 2007 come attached with running gear? i mean its one day short of march, the third freaking month of the year. where the hell did all that time go to? days seem to be slipping too quickly into weeks that can't wait to form months. in no time will july end and august start, beginning that long-awaited (and not to mention overdued) phase in my life. sure i've always said that i couldn't wait for uni to start and well, i'm not complaining in that aspect, but it just feels like this huge creepy wake-up call. i'm going to turn 21.

and then 22, 23, 24...

thine sweet searing arrow

valentine's day is here once again its time for an obligatory post on love, the lack of it or anything in between.

sometimes in my life i wonder why i'm not the guy that's girl crazy. i'm sure you all know what kind of guy i'm talking about: the one who pines for a female companion and whines incessently for a girlfriend when single and probably even when attached. the one who seemingly will die without one and will go all out to look for one as if his very molecules depend on the existence of another.

sure love is great. the countless poets and romantics who have written volumes on love were all right. and i cant agree any less even after my first experience with love left a lingering bittersweet taste. but, like i said, i have never actually gone out to search for the one, or to be more precise, that one that seekers believe is the one.

the main reason why i've never really been that kinda guy's probably because of my friends. the friends that i have are god-sends and that's probably why i never really felt empty or yearnful. sure sometimes i do think about that one gal, but it's never really that often and i never act on it. i guess i've filled the need-a-girlfriend-hole with something else.

(plus being a cynic sure doesnt help)

i just cant help wondering if that's a good thing or not.