am i living it right?

maybe i shouldnt have gone into it. maybe i should have just left it alone and not let anything happen.
what are you kidding!? of course i couldnt.
could i live with the knowledge of not doing anything? a resounding hell no.
i knew it was going to be tough, just didnt expect it to be painful.
but i have no regrets, never will.
and now that we've come so far, i'm not ready to let go when i still can hold on. am i bloody selfish? please tell me if i am, because you know what, i feel like i am sometimes.
i just want to spend as much time as i possibly can.
i know ive said this a thousand times, but i wish things could be different.
but you play the hand your dealt, and when the time comes, i have to fold.