big news, well for me at least.

dad had a talk with me yesterday.
he was saying how i should study hard and get my 4 As and get into medical school if i can.
the usual stuff.
now here's the kicker:
dad said that if i dont get into med school here, he'll send me abroad to study. australia or something. he said it so matter-a-factly that it was just that; kinda like i'm gonna study medicine no matter what, or in this case, where.

sure some of you might think this is good news, but i dont know.
all my perfectly laid out plans to go to nus, do some bio course, then enter nie, get training and finally teach till i'm, old, grey and wrinkly is now in ruins. i mean now there's this other option, a fork in the road, and i have no idea where to go.
its frustrating.

and another thing; it aint gonna be good on their pockets.
lodging, fees, provisions, flight tickets... the list goes on and it just spells burden.
sure i can take up a job but lets get serious, what i'll earn will probably be a negligible contribution.
and if they use their resources on me, there's a whole lot of pressure to succeed, cos if i fail, then its not only my future that i'm jeopardizing.
but then if i actually succeed, then obviously, my future will be more rewarding.

this is tough.